2020/10/06 13:38:30

What is the correct answer? About "words of condolence" to the family

If an acquaintance dies, you may feel sad and suddenly surprised.

Since the death of a person comes suddenly, most people are wondering how to receive the news after receiving the news.

Similarly, it can be a hassle because you will be ready to attend the funeral after receiving the obituary. Many people are ready for mourning and spirituality, but not for their hearts and words. Even if you attend the funeral, you cannot silently hand over the Holy Spirit and return without greeting the bereaved family, so you should organize your mind when you receive a sudden news and prepare words for the bereaved family. it might be.

However, the wording of the funeral is difficult. Funerals require words of condolence that are appropriate for the occasion, such as "No specific words" and "It is important to consider the bereaved family." I'm wondering what kind of words I should prepare. Therefore, this time, I would like to introduce the words of condolence to the bereaved family that I want to remember, and briefly summarize the points to note in the words of condolence.


Simple words of condolence are the best

Before introducing the fixed phrases of words to the bereaved family, I will first introduce the points to note.

However, it does not mean that "this word is absolutely useless" or "hang your head at this angle when talking to the bereaved family". Even if you follow fine etiquette, sometimes it will be rude if you pass the courtesy, so the most important thing is not whether you follow the etiquette but whether you can consider the bereaved family.

For example, suppose a young child died. In this case, I thought to cheer up the bereaved family with a bright topic following the words of condolence. What would the bereaved family think if the attendees started talking about "My child is late?" You may think that you are talking about a bright topic and get into the conversation. However, since the bereaved family has just lost their child, they may be reminded of the child who just died and feel hurt. Or what if you attend the funeral of someone who died in an accident? What do you think of a person who died from drinking too much alcohol?

The feelings of the bereaved family are naive. It's important to note that "choosing a topic or word" is important, whether you're saying condolences or having a conversation. It is highly likely that simple words and conversations will not stimulate the emotional aspects of the bereaved family.


Keep words and conversations simple.

With the above points in mind, let's think about a fixed phrase that can be used as a word of condolence.

What is the fixed phrase of condolence words? According to the distance scene


"This time, I'm sorry."
"Thank you very much for your pity."

Here is a typical example of a fixed phrase of simple words of condolence. Besides this,

"I am sorry for your loss"
"I'm sorry for the inconvenience."

Is also a representative of condolences.

In particular, the word "I would like to express my condolences" is one of the words of condolence to the bereaved family that is often used to convey feelings by postcard or letter when you cannot attend the funeral directly. You can say hello to the bereaved family in any language, but don't forget that the bereaved family is naive. I think it is necessary to change the words according to the flow and state of the conversation.

Not all bereaved families do so, and most of the time they give it as a fixed phrase, but some bereaved families who are deeply sadden say, "I'm sorry for the inconvenience." Some people show discomfort, such as "what do you know about your heart?" The word "I'm sorry for your inconvenience" is a fixed phrase of condolence and is a commonly used word, but I remembered that words like "I understand your feelings" can be unpleasant for some people. It would be better.


Please refer to the character of the bereaved family and the content of the conversation with other people and choose which one looks good in the fixed phrase.

Words of condolence can be matched to the relationship and distance with the bereaved family

Other than that,


"It was a sudden thing."
"We pray for the souls"
"I'm sorry for the longevity."

Is also a fixed phrase of condolence words. In particular, you often hear the phrase "I pray for your soul." The words "It was a sudden thing" and "I'm sorry for the longevity" are also frequently used fixed phrases.

However, it seems that some bereaved families are uncomfortable with the word "longevity." It seems that the feelings of the bereaved family are to remember the repulsion, "Can I die if I have a long life?" Also, when a long-lived person dies, some people feel comfortable using the word "It was a big death", but this also leads to repulsion and discomfort asking "Can I die if I live long?" It is safer to remember that there is.

The bereaved family who lost their family is very naive. At the same time, sadness can make you feel angry or uncomfortable because you don't usually feel anything. Those who attend are also feeling sad, and while wondering what words to say to the bereaved family, I am expressing my condolences, but those who remember that sometimes they pass each other with the feelings of the bereaved family. Isn't it wise?

Condolences are simple. And it is safer to use the phrase "I'm glad it was ..." in consideration of the relationship with the bereaved family. The way the bereaved family receives it may be different if someone who is almost red says "You have a long life" and a relative who has been interacting with you for many years says "You have a long life". ..

Add words of labor to words of condolence

In addition to the words of condolence, we may also add words of compassion for the bereaved family.


After saying a word of condolence as a greeting,

"Everyone (of the bereaved family) takes good care of themselves"

When you use words of labor such as, or when you give a spirit in addition to greetings,


"Please offer before the Spirit (Please offer)"
"It's just my heart."

It is also good to add such as.

Simple is also the best here. If you speak too much, you may inadvertently say a word that the bereaved family does not want to hear, and you will have to reflect on it later.

Condolences can be simple and standard words. And the words to be added can be just one word while giving consideration to the bereaved family and handing over the spirit.




There is no correct answer to the words of condolence to the bereaved family.

Because the feelings of the bereaved family can only be understood by the bereaved family. Immediately after the death of a person, the feelings of the bereaved family are very naive. That's why you may feel uncomfortable even if you don't usually feel uncomfortable at all.

Rather than saying an extra word and hurt the feelings of the bereaved family, it is safer to say only a fixed phrase with a few words. In addition, use words that consider the spirit and the bereaved family. In some cases, it is also a good idea to refer to the words of the person who is giving a condolence greeting to the bereaved family in front of you.

Choosing words for funerals can be very annoying. There are two points, "simple" and "consideration for the bereaved family", and points to note.