About the flow and the manners of cremation

Do you have the impression that the funeral is "difficult"?

Yes, on one side it is. The funeral is a place for a human being to close the curtain. Manners are required for funerals because it is a farewell party for the family, which is important for the family. Funerals have their own manners and customs, such as clothes and incense.

Manners tend to focus on the overall manners of funerals, but there are also individual manners such as casket and cremation. We will explain the manners of cremation and cremation along with the flow. This is the knowledge that you should remember together with the manners of the funeral ritual.

What is the flow from cremation to cremation?

The casket is very important in the funeral. Because the casket is the last minute with the deceased, "the moment when the deceased is sent out at the funeral". The deceased's casket is closed at the casket ceremony. I can't see the face of the deceased anymore. After the cremation after the casket, the next thing you see is the remains.

The funeral itself is a farewell to the deceased, but since the casket is a "sending out for cremation," it can be said to be a true "farewell." I want to do my best with manners because it is an important moment to send out the deceased.

In order to understand etiquette, it will be easier to understand if you simply control the flow of the casket and cremation. First of all, let's know the basics of the flow from the casket to the cremation.

-Farewell flower
-Coffin
-Move to the crematorium
-Ceremony of payment
-Cremation
-Bone raising

This is the flow from the coffin to the cremation. Before the cremation, the word "farewell flower" was included and you might have thought "that?". This farewell flower ritual is held just before the casket. It's a good idea to remember it as a set with a coffin.

The etiquette that you want to be careful about when you go out and cremate is "time"

Now that you understand the basic flow, let's deepen your understanding of basic etiquette. What the attendees should pay particular attention to when attending the bone-raising from the farewell flower is "time". Being careful about time is the first etiquette.

Cremation is done at a municipal cremation facility. The cremation facility will be booked one after another. Cremation reservations are made in hourly increments, with the feeling of "cremation of the house from XX to XX". If the farewell flower-payment ceremony does not proceed smoothly and on time, the cremation of another house may be delayed or the time may have to be staggered, which may cause inconvenience to other houses.

For example, suppose there is an attendee who was chatting with the bereaved family until the end at the funeral of Family A. The time was off by 10 minutes due to the chat, and the process from the farewell flower to the coffin was delayed by 10 minutes. When the bereaved family headed for the crematorium after leaving the casket, they were caught in a traffic jam, which was another 5 minutes late. The payment ceremony will begin 15 minutes later than the schedule. The cremation was also delayed by 15 minutes. The start of cremation is also 15 minutes late.

The cremation time is fixed. Even if the cremation of the next house is waiting, the cremation cannot be rounded up before the fixed time. As a result of the cremation being delayed by 15 minutes, the cremation of the next house was also delayed. Delays in one home can affect the funeral of another.

I don't know what will happen at the funeral. Sometimes the funeral schedule is delayed for unforeseen reasons.

There is no help for it if there is a reason such as being caught in a traffic jam while transporting the deceased to the crematorium. Contact the crematorium or funeral company and ask them to make adjustments as much as possible. As for the manners of attendees, it is necessary to understand that the time is set in minutes, 30 minutes, and 1 hour, and cooperate so as not to delay the ritual.

A smooth funeral requires the cooperation of attendees. The same is true for the casket and cremation that are part of the funeral. Pay attention to "time" and cooperate so that it can proceed smoothly. Do not act to delay the ritual. If there are circumstances, talk to the mourner or the person in charge of the funeral home and make appropriate adjustments. It's important.

What kind of manners do farewell flowers and coffins have?

From here, I will explain the flow of cremation and cremation in a little more detail, and touch on a little etiquette that I want to keep other than "time". I will explain along the flow of the ritual. At the same time, let's review the flow of cremation from the coffin.

Farewell flower

It is a ritual to add flowers to the deceased side of the coffin. Receive one flower (or several flowers if the number of people is small) and offer it to the deceased in the casket. Decorate the casket with flowers and fill the gaps with flowers.

The order starts with the mourner, and it is good manners to start with those who were close to the deceased's life, such as relatives who are close to the deceased. Friends, acquaintances, company colleagues, etc. should wait quietly for their turn, without breaking up before the mourner or relatives.

You may put money with the flowers. This is a custom that has been practiced for a long time because "a ship fee is required to cross the Sanzu River". Currently, the local government may warn you "Please do not enter". Even if you want to put not only money but also letters and personal belongings of the deceased, it is good manners not to put it in without permission. It is a good idea to check with the mourner, the person in charge of the ceremony hall, or the local government office in advance.

The funeral director basically prepares the farewell flowers. However, if the flower is a plan with an extra charge or a plan with a strong custom-made nature, the flower for the farewell flower may not be prepared unless you order it. This is the last farewell before the casket. We recommend that you check in advance so that no trouble will occur.

Moving from the coffin to the crematorium

The casket is taken from the deceased's feet. This is to prevent the deceased from returning from the land of the dead.
The casket is carried out by a powerful male bereaved family or a funeral officer. It is good manners for other attendees to see off with a gassho or a silent ceremony. When the deceased departs for the crematorium, the bereaved family and attendees will follow suit to the crematorium.

Not all attendees will accompany you to the crematorium. The basics are relatives, and those who wish to attend or who the mourner asks to attend go to the crematorium.

Ceremony of payment, bone raising

When you arrive at the crematorium, we will say goodbye just before the cremation. An altar will be prepared at the crematorium, and the monk will read the sutras and say goodbye to the cremation.

During the cremation, it is customary to prepare water because it is said that the deceased is not completely obsessed with the body and that he is thirsty. The water will be changed several times during the cremation.

After the cremation, a pair of people pick up the remains with bamboo chopsticks. It is good manners to pick up the ashes from the teeth first.

Finally

The casket and cremation are the last minute of the funeral, a true farewell to the deceased. That's why I want to make goodbye beautiful with good manners.

The most important thing at a funeral is not to sternly think that this is a violation of etiquette. It is a heart and consideration. Isn't it important to think, "I want to send it cleanly because it's goodbye" and "I'm sure people who are waiting for the next cremation will want to send it cleanly."