2020/10/04 13:44:10

About etiquette and customs when heading to the crematorium

The single word "funeral" is sometimes used to describe "a series of rituals to say goodbye to the deceased."
However, this one word often includes a general flow such as cremation and wake.

Even if you think of a funeral as a flow, different manners are required for each division such as cremation and wake. It may be a problem if you attend the funeral with the same etiquette as you go to night. Similarly, the manners are different because the farewell ceremony and the cremation are different rituals. If you think about it in the same way and attend, you will be seen by strange eyes around you.

By understanding the etiquette that suits each ritual, the funeral, which is the final stage of the deceased, can proceed smoothly. Remembering etiquette leads to beautifully sending out the deceased. It also reduces the burden on bereaved families and mourners.

Head to the crematorium at the time of cremation. What kind of manners are required at this time? Know the cremation and crematorium etiquette so that you can smoothly connect to the crematorium ritual.

What are crematoriums and cremation etiquette?

Manners about the crematorium, but the basics are the same as the funeral. You don't have to change your clothes just because you're heading to the crematorium. There is no problem in attending with the mourning clothes worn at the funeral. Manners are to understand "do your best" and "an extension of the funeral." I will take up concretely.

Crematorium and cremation flow

The funeral was completed without a hitch, and the deceased was sent to the crematorium. Attendees also head to the crematorium. When you arrive at the crematorium, prepare an altar (final check if it is available) and ask the monk to give you a sutra. Later, the deceased is cremated, and those who attend the crematorium wait until the cremation is over. After the cremation, pick up the ashes and put them in the urn.

This is the basic cremation process.

For cremation, there is basically no need to change the date of a cremation-only ritual (such as sending it to a crematorium) after the funeral. As soon as the funeral is over, we will leave for the crematorium, so we will soon see off the deceased. Therefore, the clothes will be the same as at the funeral.

Depending on the area, it will continue from the funeral, so it is unlikely that you will rewrap the incense for cremation. However, since the mourner may wrap the cremation offering around the priest, it is a good idea to check with the funeral shop about the financial matters, both the attendee and the mourner.

Manners to see off to the crematorium

The basic flow is roughly fixed, so all you have to do is proceed smoothly.
The point of cremation etiquette is to understand that it is connected from the funeral and that it is an extension, and to cooperate so that it can proceed smoothly.

What you should be careful about for smooth progress is the manners of seeing off the deceased.

The deceased will be sent off immediately after the funeral. In the casket of the deceased, flowers are displayed one by one in order from the mourner.
This is called a "farewell flower". Flowers are offered starting with the mourner, followed by the mourner in the order in which they have a close relationship with the deceased. If you are a colleague or acquaintance of your company, wait in line after your relatives and wait quietly.

After that, seal the casket. Carry out the sealed casket. Whether it is foot-to-head or head-to-head may vary from region to region. There is no mistake if you ask the person in charge of the funeral company to instruct you.

The deceased will drive to the crematorium first. At this time, it is good manners to bow down and see off. The mourners and attendees will soon follow by car. The cremation has a fixed time, so if it is delayed, it will affect the next cremation. If you arrive late at the crematorium, it is a good idea to contact the crematorium.

Also, since you need to go to the crematorium immediately after sending out the deceased, it is safe to avoid stopping the mourner or bereaved family for greetings or chatting. It is important to express your condolences, but when heading to the crematorium, there is a time game. As a manner of attendees, please refrain from greetings at this time.

I don't always accompany the crematorium

Just because you attended a funeral does not mean that you have to go to the crematorium. People who are closely related to the deceased, such as the mourner, bereaved family, and relatives, will accompany the crematorium.

Many funeral attendees do not need to go to the crematorium. It does not mean that "attending the funeral = accompanying the crematorium". Cremation is carried out toward the crematorium in the flow of the funeral, but it is necessary to consider whether or not you have to attend.

Those who attend the crematorium will be informed in advance by the mourner and the bereaved family. If you haven't been asked to attend, but would like to accompany you to the crematorium, let the mourner or bereaved family know in advance. Tea and sweets are also served during the cremation, so if an unexpectedly large number of people come to the crematorium, the funeral performer must make appropriate preparations.

Cremation is, so to speak, a place for the deceased to part with the body. It is important to see off the deceased with all your heart. Equally important is the dedication to the mourners and bereaved families so that the cremation can proceed smoothly.


Even if you say funeral in a word, there are rituals such as commuting, funeral, cremation, farewell ceremony, etc., and it is difficult that the manners are different for each ritual. The basic etiquette is mourning, but it doesn't matter if you wear mourning dress, and you have to know the basic etiquette that suits the ritual.

Not only those who have hardly experienced a funeral, but also those who have experienced a funeral are often confused by this manner. This is because the manners may differ slightly from region to region. Funerals can be difficult for experienced people, as the manners for mourners and bereaved families may differ depending on whether the funeral is large or small (family funeral). It seems that there are many.

There is also proper etiquette for sending out at the time of cremation and at the crematorium. You should attend the crematorium in good manners, but you should not be bound by the manners and impose on your opponent. Ultimately, what is important at the crematorium is "feelings." The crematorium is the place where the deceased separates from the body. Send with all your heart. I think this is the correct manner of cremation and crematorium.